திருமண தத்வம்

WEDDING PREPARATIONS

On the wedding day, the marriage hall and wedding altar are tastefully decorated to reflect the local fauna and flora - festoons of mango leaves, flowers, plantain trees and Kolam or Rangoli on the floor (colorful, geometric designs on the floors with colored powders). A festive atmosphere prevails. Women wear colorful silk sarees and dazzling ornaments. Women have a very important role to play throughout the marriage and some of the rituals are exclusively theirs. The nadaswaram (also called nagaswaram - a wind pipe instrument) accompanied by thavil (percussion drum) is an important part of the marriage. No marriage ever takes place without it in the South. This ancient musical instrument of South India is highly venerated. The traditional belief is that its auspicious music heralds in tranquility and beatitude. The musicians play a variety of classical tunes (ragas) to suit every ceremony during the marriage.

PRIESTS

Generally, every family has their own priest who conducts the wedding. They are Vedic scholars - thoroughly acquainted with Vedic practices, ceremonies, prayers, rituals and the mantras (Vedic hymns). They conduct the wedding in accordance with the Vedic tenets. In Hindi, the priest is called the pandit, from which comes the word "Pundit". The Sanskrit and Tamil words are purohit and vadhyar.

The chief priest brings a group of Brahmin priests and assigns various duties, including the chanting of Mantras. He presides over the function as the ceremonial Lord and supervises its progress. The bride and the groom, parents and close relatives are instructed by him on all their duties during the function. The chief priest (brahaspathi) represents higher Gods at the ceremony and is therefore treated with great respect ad piety. He plays the most important role in the wedding. Generous donations are given to the Brahmins in cash, clothes and other forms as guru dakshina (offerings to the teacher). These priests play a vital role in society.

WEDDING EVENTS

Traditionally, South Indian weddings lasted for five days. Nowadays, a typical South Indian wedding takes a day and a half. We will now describe the events that take place in a typical wedding.

VISHWAKSENA ARADHANA (PRAYER TO LORD VISWAKSENA)

VISHWAKSENA ARADHANA (Prayers to the God Vishwaksena - Chief Commandment of Lord Vishnu's retinue), is the first prayer performed. Viswaksena is the Lord of Wisdom, Dispenser of Success in all undertakings, and the eliminator of obstacles. As a rule, Sri Vaishnavites invoke Vishwaksena prior to commencing any ceremony or function.

WELCOMING THE GROOM

The evening before the wedding day, a grand welcome is accorded to the bridegroom and his entourage by the parents, family members and the friends of the bride. After offering presents and ornaments to the groom, the parents of the bride formally invite the groom and his party to the place of the wedding. The procession usually commences from a temple after prayers by both the parties under guidance of the priest. This procession is called Janavasam (similar to the baraat of North India). The groom, duly well dressed, travels in a decorated open vehicle lead by Nadaswaram troupe with their music.

This event serves as the public introduction and announcement of the bridegroom to Society. After arrival at the marriage hall, a short ceremony of betrothal is performed by the priest, followed by feasting and entertainment (music, ballet etc). The marriage hall, with its festive atmosphere, becomes a bustling center of social interaction.

WEDDING DAY

After the ceremonial bath in the morning, the bridegroom is escorted to the altar to commence his prayers and rituals. Several prayers (or pujas) are performed during the ceremony, led by the chief priest, chanting the appropriate mantras. The initial prayers prepare the bride and groom for the Muhurtham, the most auspicious time to solemnize and sanctify the wedding. This time and day of the marriage are calculated by pundits from Panchangams (Hindu almanacs) based on the birth stars and ruling planets of the bride and the groom. This time usually falls during the morning. The chief pundit ensures that the required ceremonies are completed before the Muhurtham, as follows:

VRATHAM (THE MATRIMONIAL VOW)

This ceremony is performed by the bridegroom before the marriage ceremony. The bride performs Jathakarma & Namakarna ritual before actual commencement of wedding ceremony. While the groom conducts the ceremony himself, guided by the pundits, the father of the bride performs Jathakarma & Namakarna on her behalf. Oblations are poured into agni in tribute to the Vedic-Gods, - invoking them individually. It is a solemn request to the Gods, inviting them to witness the oath taking and the marriage ceremony. The pundit chants the appropriate mantras while the groom pours he oblations into the agni. After invoking each God the pundit pronounces 'Avahayami' (The Gods have arrived) followed by 'Idham Asanam' (The Gods are seated). The belief is that the Gods shall stay throughout the Wedding and shower the blessings on the couple and the congregation. Some of the Gods invoked are Soma (for fine progeny), Varuna (abundance and wealth), Brahaspathi (impeccable morals and conduct), Gandharvas (conjugal bliss), Indra (power and protection), Adityas, Visvadevas (health, long life and compassion), and Surya (the Sun - purity, wisdom and peace). After completion of this ceremony, a yellow thread soaked in turmeric solution is tied on the wrists of the groom and the bride. This is called Kappu or Kankanam (a protective charm to indicate they are under oath). The Couple are exhorted to abide by the Vedic dictum on moral, social and spiritual obligations and responsibilities of married life. The bridegroom repeats these mantras as narrated by the pundits. After this oath, nine earthen bowls are brought containing edible seeds (lentils, rice). Water is poured into these bowls. The seeds sprout and are immersed in a river later. This ceremony is called palikai, and symbolizes fertility and compatibility.

Nichaya Muhurtham (Proclamation of Betrothal)

The bride and groom are led to the ceremonial altar and platform by their parents and the pundits. There in the presence of all the guests, the chief pundit declares the commencement of the marriage rituals. The pundits introduce both the bride and the groom, tracing their respective lineage from the preceding three generations - their names and Gotra (clan). The names and the Gotras of the couple, their parents, grandparents and great-grandparents are recited. This announcement is considered as the proclamation of the betrothal and marks the commencement of the marriage ceremonies and the beginning of the Muhurtham.

NAANDI DEVATHA PUJA (PRAYERS TO VEDIC DEITIES)

The bridegroom continues with this ritual under the guidance of the pundit. A small leafy branch of pipal tree is planted in the center of the altar, and milk is poured by Sumangalis (noble married ladies). Though explanations vary, the common belief is that this ritual is intended to offer oblations to the 33 Vedic Deities. These benevolent deities symbolize splendor, strength, knowledge, wealth and truth. The Vedic Gods belong to three orders: Terrestrial (Prithivisthana). Aerial or Intermediate (Madhya-masthana) and Celestial (Dayusthana). They are invoked to subdue evil forces and make nature benevolent. The hymns chanted describe the individual characteristics and distinctive traits of each god.

On completion of this worship, new clothes are presented to the bridegroom and the bride, after they are anointed with sandal paste, vermilion (Kumkum) and turmeric powder. The presumption is that these Deities arrive to witness the wedding and bless the couple and the assemblage with peace and prosperity.

KASI YATRA (PILGRIMAGE TO KASI OR VARANASI)

The Hindu code of Law and Justice (Dharma Sastra) formulates four successive stages of a man's life. The first stage is Brahmacharin, a student's days with his guru at his hermitage learning the Vedas, while observing strict celibacy and discipline. The second stage is Grihasta, in which a man enters married life, establishes a household, begets children, and discharges all social and religious responsibilities. The third stage is Vanaprastha, in which he dwells in the forest as a hermit devoted mainly to meditation. The final stage is Samyasin (ascetic) where he becomes an ascetic, renouncing the world to meditate on the Atman, or supreme soul, and to achieve union with it. The ascetic does not follow rituals or ceremonies. A man may opt to enter married life or to become an ascetic at the early stage of life. To become an ascetic, he must, after his studies (Brahmacharin), proceed to Kasi in pursuit of higher knowledge. Through the ages, the Hindus have revered Kasi (Varanasi) as the holiest place and seat of learning. The tradition holds that every Hindu, after completing his studies, proceeds to Kasi in pursuit of higher knowledge in philosophy. This choice is Jana Marga, the path of wisdom.

In the Kasi Yatra ceremony, the bridegroom (Brahmachari, or bachelor) is supposed to be commencing his pilgrimage to the holy city of Kasi to seek a guru for learning advanced philosophy to attain salvation. here, the father of the bride intercepts him and endearingly dissuades him from the pilgrimage, assuring the groom that the same supreme state could be attained through married life. The father of the bride promises to give his daughter to the groom for becoming a Grihasta (married man). In this ceremony, the groom is attired in yellow robes and holds an umbrella and some religious texts - like a young monk.

The bride's father addresses the groom thus: "We accord you a grand welcome. O Mahavishnu in human form. Please step into my house and I shall give away my daughter to you in marriage". The bride's father then places a coconut and flowers in the hands of the groom and leads him to the entrance of the marriage hall. There, the bride and the groom exchange garlands and are seated on a swing. Sumangalis circumambulate the swing singing devotional songs that describe the marriages of various Gods. They carry oil lamps, flowers, water in silver pots, and colored cooked rice. These are scattered around the swing, which is believed to ward off all evil spells.

The Hindus believe in triad of gods (Trimurti) composed of Brahma, the creator, Vishnu, the preserver, and Shiva, the destroyer. By describing the groom as an incarnation of the god Mahavishnu (Vishnu), the father's invitation implies the indirect meaning of the Vedanta, that everything is an incarnation of the triad.